Hang in right there!

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Ever had a mixture, a rollercoaster of feelings and emotions?

You see the kind where you feel like you’re going through a foggy and cloudy sheet of thick and deep melancholy. Where you ooze little energy, just enough to keep you going albeit slowly. In fact, the energy is so low that it is just enough to keep you steady, just firm so you do not fall or slide back. Just enough to hold on, but not enough to move forward.

You feel as though you are overwhelmed, that there’s a lot in your in-tray yet you can’t figure out what to dispense with first because everything is urgent.

All of a sudden, you feel like you are carrying a bag of mixed feelings, nay; a heavy load, like you are in an abyss of emotions.

You feel like there’s a lot sweeping you away and the strength to keep pushing is fading away. That you are hanging in by the skin of your teeth!

That so many things are not adding up. That there’s a lot of pressure, whose source you cannot explain.
Where you are in solitude and nothing seems to make sense. You start asking questions: what matters in life? What is life? Who has life’s manual? Why work so hard whilst everything is vanity? What is happiness? How do you achieve it? What is the reason for human existence? Why….? Who…..? When….? Where….?

That you have been strong for yourself but that strength is waning, fading. More or less of a burnout. That you’ve been a strong tower, a fortress, for others but you are now shaky. Everything else is sinking sand!

That your source of strength is running out.
Your mental and emotional strength seems to be running dry. Like the Biblical Widow of Zarephath who feeds Elijah with her last piece of bread, you are holding onto the last straws, depletion of which will spell doom and gloom.

That few things are making sense or are adding up. That enthusiasm is now almost a alien, stranger than fiction.

That there’s a lot waiting for you to do but the vigor, vivacity and vim has departed from you. Most importantly, you feel like time is not on your side.

That even the work you do, the wares you sell, the hustle you engage in, the struggles, the….., all seem now not to give you any satisfaction. Apart from paying bills, feeding your family, buying clothing, so what?

You feel like you have stagnated, you are not moving. And you do not know how to move. Because, how do you move without strength!

You feel a strong sense of belonging, care and sociability is lacking. You feel you want to establish something bigger than you. You have a strong desire to care, love and protect. But who to do it to, how to do it?

For you are choosy and careful of who you welcome to your heart. So that you protect your inner person more, for they hurt the inner being before. The inner person longs for love, but is careful to evaluate and select the companion. He is healed and ready but overly cautious. Nay, extremely cautious.

For the first time in a long while, you feel vulnerable, exposed, naked, weak. But you keep pushing, somehow.

You feel like you need a rebirth; mental, spiritual, social and financial renaissance!

But, like the Biblical Persistent Woman/the Importunate Widow who tirelessly and persistently visited the Unjust Judge so he could dispense justice- which he finally delivered-you must hold on!

Hang in there!

For if there is nobody to hold your hands, put your hands in your pockets and continue walking. Keep walking!

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